The highs and the lows. The dark nights and the sunny days. The good and the bad.
That’s life, isn’t it? Without the bad we wouldn’t be able to recognize the good, that’s something I truly believe and remind myself of very often. It’s the reason I believe we shouldn’t fear blocks, obstacles, problems, the darkness…
I realize I have recently entered the darker nights of this life again. My soul feels very heavy, weighed down by my own life’s troubles, by the world’s chaotic state, and by my mind and emotions playing some tricks on me. When this happens I often struggle and try to resist it at first. I slap on some happy affirmations and try to socialize and laugh louder, even though I want to not laugh at all. Eventually I cannot fight it anymore. I let go and let my heart sink down into a dark hole.
It is what is needed sometimes, for me. My soul knows it, my unconscious knows it’s for the best, and after some time my conscious Higher Self also starts to understand it’s time to let the darkness in.
But I never let it swallow me whole. I know my limits by now, I know how to keep my head above the water, and for how long I can stay down there.
I let it happen. I don’t enjoy it, there’s no pleasure. But I simply know that it’s needed. In the long run it keeps me balanced – in the long run it helps me see the good, the sweet, the light.
It’s different each time, and I find it hard to know how to deal with it now that it’s just starting. But the puzzle pieces will fall into place soon, they always do.
I know difficult time awaits me, I know it will be tough, hard, messy. But I also know I come out stronger afterwards, every time. I come out with a bigger understanding of life, of myself, of humanity.
I know it’s a cliché, but it’s during these dark weeks I know my card reading will bring me so much more wisdom, my writing will enlighten me so much, and my meditations will show me magic.
The lessons I learn are so much bigger than the pain I feel for a while. I must remember this, this time too.